Irshad Mushtaq
Today, many children in Kashmir are spending too much time on mobile phones. They are getting comfort, entertainment, and easy habits, but they are not learning enough responsibility. This is a serious issue for every family.
If a child only learns comfort today, how will that child handle difficulty tomorrow? If a child does not learn small responsibilities at home, how will that child manage bigger responsibilities in life?
The real problem
This is not only the child’s problem. In many cases, it is the problem of the home environment.
Children learn from what they see. They copy parents, elders, and the atmosphere of the house. If the home is full of shouting, mobile addiction, laziness, stress, and bad habits, children learn the same things.
Home is the first school
Many people think school will teach everything. But the first school of a child is the home.
At home, children should learn:
• How to speak politely.
• How to keep things in order.
• How to respect elders.
• How to do small work themselves.
• How to value time and money.
If a child cannot clean a table, arrange a bag, polish shoes, or help at home, then that child may become dependent on others.
Too much mobile use
Mobile phones are becoming a big problem. Many children are busy with games, videos, and online activities for long hours.
This affects their mind. It reduces patience, focus, and discipline. It also makes them think that life should always be fun and easy.
Real life is not like that. Real life needs effort, patience, and hard work.
Children must know the value of money
Many children see money being spent, but they do not see how hard it is to earn. They see recharges, online shopping, gaming expenses, food orders, and comfort. Slowly, they start thinking that money comes easily.
This is dangerous.
Children should learn:
• Money is earned with hard work.
• Money should not be wasted.
• Labour has value.
• Saving is important.
• Need and want are not the same.
If children do not respect money today, they may misuse it tomorrow.
The pressure in Kashmiri society
In Kashmir, many families are under social pressure. Parents compare their children with others. They compare schools, clothes, gadgets, and lifestyles.
Because of this, even small children are sent to expensive schools very early. Admission fees, monthly fees, books, uniforms, and transport create a big burden.
Many families are not doing this happily. They are doing it because of fear, comparison, and social pressure.
Education should build character
Education is not only about fees, books, and big school names. Education should build character.
A good child is not made only by expensive schooling. A good child is made by values, manners, discipline, responsibility, and emotional support.
Parents should ask: Are we building a child, or are we only paying bills?
Respect for work
Children should learn to do simple work themselves. This is very important.
They should learn to:
• Keep their things properly.
• Bring water for themselves.
• Help in the house.
• Respect workers, maids, and helpers.
• Understand that no honest work is small.
If a child becomes dependent on others for every small thing, that child may grow without discipline and respect.
Parents must change first
Many parents blame children. But before blaming children, parents must look at themselves.
Parents should ask:
• Am I giving enough time to my child?
• Am I always angry in front of my child?
• Am I teaching by example?
• Am I using my own mobile too much?
• Am I showing discipline at home?
Children learn more from what parents do than from what parents say.
Small changes can change society
Some people think one family cannot make a difference. But every change starts from one home.
If one family improves, others notice. Then more families learn. Slowly, the whole society can improve.
So real change must start from the family.
Simple solutions
1. Reduce screen time
• Set fixed mobile time.
• No mobile during meals.
• No mobile late at night.
• Encourage books, talks, and family time.
2. Give children small responsibilities
• Clean the table.
• Arrange the school bag.
• Polish shoes.
• Help with daily home tasks.
3. Teach money values
• Explain how money is earned.
• Teach saving.
• Stop unnecessary waste.
• Give small pocket money with guidance.
4. Reduce social pressure
• Do not copy others blindly.
• Choose what suits your family.
• Do not run only after the show and status.
5. Create a loving home
• Speak with love and respect.
• Do not always shout.
• Listen to children.
• Teach with patience.
Final message
Our children are our future. If we want a better future, we must raise children with values, not only with comfort.
We should give them love, time, discipline, responsibility, and good habits. We should teach them the value of money, respect for labour, and strength of character.
If parents improve themselves, children will improve too. If homes become better, society will become better. And if society becomes better, the future of Kashmir will become brighter.
The child is not the only one who needs grooming. Parents must groom themselves first.
(Irshad Mushtaq is the founder of M I Securities, Munawarabad, Srinagar, and an AMFI-registered mutual fund distributor (ARN 47504) since 2004. He works as a personal finance columnist and financial educator, focusing on bringing simple, disciplined investing and market awareness to investors in Kashmir and beyond. He can be reached at irshad@bp.sharekhan.com)